“After graduating, are you staying there or coming home?”

One question from my parents, but it sparks many others about my future. 

I am twenty one years old. I live far away from my parents to get an academic title. Sometimes I am confused about my life purpose, how to act as an adult. Often I feel anxious, worried, and hesitant to decide on life’s path. 

As the oldest child and first granddaughter in the family, it feels like there is an extra responsibility. Expectations from family and closest ones turn into haunting hopes.

People call this phase the quarter life crisis. I do not remember when I first heard the term. But from what I see and hear, especially from those who have experienced this phase, quarter life crisis is part of the adulting process.

I start questioning what I need to do and what I want in life. In the midst of anxiety and confusion, I try to find answers and keep going. There is also a promise to myself and my parents to come home with an undergraduate certificate as soon as possible. 

I spend a lot of time talking to myself, getting to know myself, and start accepting the decision I make. I try to put in some thoughts that everything will be okay. I believe that nothing in this world is futile. 

Get through it and keep going.